Thursday, March 23, 2017

‘Yes, But How Did He Die?’ Ghoulish American Public Asks Of Recent Celebrity Death While Rubbing Delicate, Bony Hands Together And Smiling Thinly http://tinyurl.com/klybvj8

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<p>WASHINGTONâ€"A glint of
curiosity in their otherwise lifeless eyes, the
American public ghoulishly asked Thursday upon
hearing of a recent celebrity death, “Yes, but
how did he die?” as they rubbed their bony hands
together and thinly smiled. “Was it an
overdose?” said Mark Gansby of Chelmsford, MA,
one of the hundreds of millions of Americans who
licked their cracked, desiccated lips and wanted
to know if he died peacefully or suffered first.
“Was there blood? Did he die alone in a hotel
room or something?” At press time, the nation
had learned the celebrity had taken his own life
and, saliva beading on the corners of their
mouths, leaned in to ask if he shot himself. </p>


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http://www.theonion.com/article/yes-how-did-he-die-ghoulish-american-public-asks-r-55604?utm_medium=RSS&amp;utm_campaign=feeds

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